* My book is available for advance order! Check it out!
* Well, here we are… 2003. I remember sitting in grade school way back when and tying to add up how old I’d be in the mythical Year 2000… I couldn’t even imagine. Now that it has come and gone, I look at myself and realize I couldn’t fully explain to that little child who she would become any more than I could explain the evolution of the universe. I guess all I could say is, you will become more and more yourself, with every passing day.
* I was always a writer. I used to have a little wire-bound notebook of music paper on which I wrote out the theme to Star Wars (a movie I didn’t actually see until I was about 19) and other songs we played on our xylophones in grade school. There were alot of pages left over after the transcription of those tunes, so I filled it with parody lyrics to songs of the day: Rhinestone Cowboy, Cats in the Cradle… ha ha, I wish that book hadn’t burned up. Seeing those first attempts at humor in that little child’s handwriting always made me laugh. Of course I stopped laughing when our house burned down one Christmas morning, taking with it most of my childhood photos and memorabilia. Kind of a blessing, though, considering my future… leaving all that behind.
* So the years passed, and notebooks filled with syrupy Mother’s Day poems and cartoon stories of sneaky snakes and doggies. Adolescent angst and self-examination. Stabs at glory and attention. And finally something I can really be proud of… my book. My memoir. My life.
* It took me several years to write Mark 947. I had a stack of old diaries, writings and memories to draw from. I had always planned to write about the incredible journey of my life… even if nothing else had happened beyond growing up in a fundamentalist Southern cult, it would have made interesting reading and been cathartic. But then there was the War, and the navy. And then the enetrtainment career. And then Barry. So much has happened in this short life. None of it easy, but all of it amazing. Some people say, “I don’t look back, and I would’t change a thing.” Well, I do look back, and try to learn, and treasure the good. And there are many things I would change, and many I surprisingly wouldn’t. But all told, life is an organic thing, a trail of footprints behind and a pathway ahead. With this book, I can rest up against a tree for a moment and reflect, and share. And I hope you can enjoy a little bit, too.

Here’s me at home on New Years Eve day. Hmm… I’m seeing Betty Crocker on Prozac…

* Wow, this morning I was adding some new thingies to the bulletin boards and BAM! All these lines of error code started flooding in! I was mortified and started scrambling to get everything fixed. Let’s just say in about an hour I installed 2 new programs, one on my web-server, and learned a bit of two new programming languages!
* One of the cool things about this bulletin board is all the cool friends and connections I’m making. Lissa, Donna and Sela all helped me out… And Lissa is in Oklahoma, Donna is Europe and Sela out in the chilly East. Amazing. Then Anneliese calls with some great medical advice…
* I was talking to my Mom on Christmas day, and she was telling me stuff about when I was young and got my first computer (the Commodore 64). How I learned to program in Basic and then Machine language. I had forgotten alot of stuff… I got the computer for Christmas, and Mom said the first thing I ever made on it was an animated thank you card, with flashing colors and a little sprite of a heart. Aww…
* Well, Kory is taking a few extra days back home, so I’m still home alone. I’ve been working hard on the webpage on one computer while the other renders out our next movie. My book should be available for ordering end of next week. Wow, things are about to change yet again for me… a book to promote, a fun growing website full of the coolest of the cool girls, another DVD. I’m so very happy! Now to see if things work out in the relationship dept…
* Aren’t those little creatures above just horribly cute! Don’t you just want to smash them to bits?! Ha ha

Ozzy got arrested in my home state? Tennessee, storehouse of many secrets…

* Well, I’ve been putting off writing my Christmas day note. Honestly this would probably look like the worst Christmas ever, if I put it down on paper: Home alone in a new city, broke, no presents, no friends, hardly any food because in LA new apartments don’t come with refrigerators! But actually I feel happy and excited. I love being somewhere new… I’ve thought about moving to California for years, and I always knew I would make my way out here eventually to start my real entertainment career. I have a cozy apartment, new online friends, an exciting new business I’m building… And in a few weeks I’m going to get to be really involved in the movie promotion. I’m very excited about the incredible work everyone did on the film and I can’t wait to do my part to get its message out.
* In terms of presents, the funny thing is, growing up we didn’t do alot of that on Christmas after we got to be about 15 or so. Mom and Dad never had much money and our church was so anti-materialism that we just had our tree and beautiful old heirloom decorations and tons of Mom’s good cooking, and MAYBE one or two presents each. Nothing big or expensive. SO Im not missing out on having stuff. All I really miss is the feeling of having someone close to me who cares about me in that special way… and if things go well I might even have that, as I have met someone really really special recently. I have no idea how things will go with that: heartbreak or happiness, but I’m learning that with some aspects of life all you can do is strap yourself in and go along for the ride.
* So today I woke up early and had Craisins® and powdered cappuccino, added some super cool new features to the Discussion BBS (Check `em out!) and then did a little work out in the apartment’s gym. And now here I am! I’m hoping to have some social activity in a little while, but no matter what I am content today. I have more than I would ever have thought possible, and if I could go back in time and hold up the head of that crying, miserable, lonely teenager I used to be and tell her what the future held, she would not even be able to begin to believe it. 

* I spent quite a bit of time today calling all over Los Angeles to find somewhere I could serve Christmas dinner to the homeless. Seriously! Everywhere I called said they didn’t need any help! Killing! That’s how I wanted to spend my Christmas here and they’ve ruined it!
* On a better note, I have my hotel booked for Sundance… whew! Expensive! Now I’m really broke. But I did get a stunning white suit to wear. 

* There’s some interesting chit chat going on in the comments thread of the Sundance post (2 posts down). Check it out…
* I can’t stop eating Craisins® They are cranberries soaked in cherry juice and then dried. Yum! I got Kory off to the airport and now it’s just me and Harry home alone. Kinda fun… I can walk around with a mud mask on and blast Sarah MacLaughlin singing “Blackbird,” possibly my favorit Beatles song. Check the lyrics:

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise.
Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to be free.

Blackbird fly Blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird fly Blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise.